Motherhood Tabutiful: Shonni's Story

A note from Ashley: 

Like a lot of the stories I share through social media, I stumbled across Shonni's story on Instagram. Her image was so beautiful but her words are what really took my breath away. This is from the post that introduced her to me.

"My life is no laughing matter, but I thank God that He always finds a way to bring laughter into my life. 

I have debated this moment for MOOOOONTHS! I am currently pregnant, surprise! Well not only that, but I am also fighting for my life and that of my child. In this war, I have had to make some hard, scary, humbling, not 100% certain decisions. I have stage 2 breast cancer. I don't tell any of this for sympathy, text messages, or for myself. I share this because as I have embarked on this journey I have not been able to find as many resources to help ME along the way. I have spoken to people with cancer, but not pregnant. I have had cancer the entire time I have been pregnant. What came first, the chicken or the egg? WHO KNOWS! Apparently, the way cancer is set that it’s always in your body, but it started losing its damn mind to a point where it was noticeable on Friday morning, October 28, 2016. 

I tried to be optimistic, but I felt in my heart it was cancerous. So, the adventure of finding out and getting a diagnosis began. It was the hurry up and wait effect. NOVEMBER 22, 2016, it was confirmed that I had stage one breast cancer. WHAT IN THEEE HELL IS GOING ON! I had just lost 40 some odd pounds and was getting my sexy together for 40 and beyond. I thank God that I lost enough weight that I could find it when I did. 

Needless to say, I was scared, but I said let's tackle this. I scheduled my appointment to have a bilateral mastectomy with a reconstruction so that I could truly come out a better model than I did going in. I cried and cried and prayed, and cried, I cried while praying, and I cussed. Finally, on December 19th the day before my surgery God and I had an amazing talk on the way into work and I was ready to take this thing head on. OH...to appease my fake clairvoyant husband who said he dreamt I was pregnant, I took the test to work. I knew it was just a formality to quiet him and move on with the surgery. I knew God would not put a child in the middle of this mess. So, I got into work and took the test. Well, y'all know how that turned out. I say this exactly "God, are you fucking kidding me? Sorry God! Thank you for this blessing."

She is fighting this disease with humor and grace and I'm so thankful that she was willing to share her story with you.

Shonni’s Story:

I TALK A LOT! I mean A LOT, but it’s funny that when I was asked to write for this blog I was like say wheeet, what do I say? What do I write? I was asked to write something inspiring and from the heart.,

so here it goes. GO KICK CANCERS AZZ!! That is what I can tell you. Cancer is an invader and it wants to take you from everyone you love and care about. It isn’t a cold that’s like a cousin who doesn’t want to leave for a week or two, it is a robber. It is coming for you, and it also is coming to place a void in your family. THAT IS UN-A- DAMN-CEPTABLE! So, get your crew, get your weapons (mine have been my prayer, laughter, and random writings) and go to work on cancer. Let it know that no one comes to take from you, because Your house is guarded by God. Cancer might have gotten in, but it can’t and won’t stay. Fight to exhaustion, and then let your friends get some licks in while you recoup. It’s like wrestling, remember the World Wrestling Federation(WWF), when wrestling was real. They would tag their teammate in to get their breath, but sometimes they would double up right before the one tagging out left. LOL!! I can see me tagging my Kevin in as he dives in off the top rope. The visual is cracking me up.

I fight for me, because daggone it I am breathtakingly wonderful, and if God chose me for this it was because He needs me to win this for the kingdom and not just myself. So, in essence if he has me, and I have already won, I just have to go through the process. It’s almost like you have the job because your friend owns the company, but you have to go through the formalities and hiring process before you start work. I also fight for my unborn child (Zoe), my first born Kelsi, and their co-creator, my ace, Kevin.

This rode even with an entourage of loved ones can get lonely. You feel at times that no one

understands or can understand, and most cant. I have spoken to many cancer survivors, but they were not and are not me. They have persevered and overcome, but none were pregnant with cancer. Even the ones that were, were staged differently. I mean you find all types of cockamamie reasons to keep saying to myself I am different. Yes, you are different and your body will respond differently, but you need whatever they had to win. Listen, learn, be humble, but fight this fight your way, because your lesson isn’t their lesson. Honor your feelings!! If you are mad that you have one boob, be mad!!! Don’t let anyone tell you it’s okay, or downplay it. You had plans for that boob dammit, even if it was just to hang lower than the other, and how dare something or someone take that from you. I am mad for you!

Now that I have 4 ill-written paragraphs I am unsure what I have said to encourage, but I can tell you this, I am here fighting with and praying for you. We all have a cancer fight. We all have something in our lives that is trying to overcome us, whether its abuse, weight, depression, unemployment, kids, or low self-esteem. IT CANNOT HAVE YOU! You have one great life to live and as soon as you finish this last sentence I expect you to get to living it! You still reading I said start after the last sentence, stop procrastinating!

DeShonjla "Shonni" Peterson is a daughter, a sister, a wife, a mom, and pregnant with Stage 2b breast cancer. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in November 2016 and discovered she was pregnant with her second child the day before she was scheduled for a bilateral mastectomy in December. That's when it hit the fan boys and girls. She chose to have a unilateral mastectomy while pregnant, but forego chemo until she birth her daughter. You can follow along with her Instagram @Logan2kelsi